What am I worth? (Synchronicity preview)

Many places in my life in the last few weeks someone has put some kind of value or asked me to put a number value on me as a person. It shook me to the core every time it happened. I am not something to be put into a numeric value. Maybe it scares me to think of myself as a cash cow. Put to slaughter for a price. One was for life insurance and disability insurance our yearly meeting with the same smiling face. She loves me I add more every year paranoid that someone will get hurt or goddess forbid die. I with having Epilepsy I constantly worry about my long term health. It's under control now, but I was told as a child I would outgrow it too. So here was the first place someone asked me to pick my big worth.

As I am applying for jobs or more like browsing the job market. I cannot say there has been much that screams LEAVE WHAT YOU HAVE! yet. But here is another place where they want you to say what you are worth. And it's some weird pissing game, that I don't understand. You don't want to put a salary too low and look desperate but you don't want to put too high either. But some people say over confident does win because it sells a demeanor that the upper management wants in an employee. I am just honest and put the amount I need to leave my current position for that position. I am not a good liar or negotiator. I am better to just put it out there and if you dig my vibe then we can work together. That is how I am playing this, I am looking for my bliss work related and I think it will find me when I find it.

My husband asked me what I thought I was worth for all the thoughts, ideas, jobs, all the potential in me what I could be worth. He had a number for himself and I waited and spit out some random number like $50,000 and I really have no idea where I came up with this number because I was just so taken back by the thought of quantifying my creativity and productivity into a number. Sometime since the birth of my kids, I had the revelation that the real currency in life was time. If we were to give people real gifts, it should be vouchers for our time and we should hold fast to meet face to face with people. Time is our most precious gift; One I have tried to give to my kids as often as they have allowed me. There have been people in my life I have been shamefully selfish with my time and my belly aches over those losses. But I have today. And I have time. I have no other value to speak of but I have time.

Don't read this-- I'm on Steroids--- Dany in Wonderland

When you have been sick for more than a day or two it messes with your mind more than you realize. Days and nights mean nothing. The numbers on the calendar only mean something if Facebook reminds you it is that assigned astrological day or shows you events from your past of this day 365 days ago. But then if you seek treatment for your fevers and barrage of systems then you are now inducing chemicals into the equations. Since my local witch doctor was closed and not an Ayurveda practitioner who takes Anthem within a 100-mile radius and I had to settle on western medicine to cure my ails they undecidedly called flu with a chance of bronchitis. So an antibiotic, a steroid, and an inhaler walk into my mouth and three blogs, one completed job, two half jobs and a lot of unfolded laundry later I am exhausted. I would love to have the thoughts flowing that this steroid inhaler combination is giving me. Not saying you are reading the next Joy of Sex Manual. But when you take enough Epilepsy meds to sedate a small family a crisp mind wanting to write, create and keep going is the closest to joy I have had since Florida. And it's like stepping through the mirror and back into Wonderland. And I am so afraid it will stop when the meds are done.



My positive Dany says no. This is my new path and through meditation and perseverance, this is the new way. Day two with meditation. No more waiting for the right meds or the right situation or the kids to be older. Today is my day to find my hippie happy every day, my joy.

Part of my joy today was seeing my offspring dance. She competes, which I hate but I love to see her art in form. Her face on the stage but even better her face off stage as she has accomplished her goal her art in whole. I have to block out the fake reality of the stages, trophies, makeup, fake hair and glitter. I just wanna see my baby spin and twirl like a two-year-old joyfully in the rain. To do that I had to leave the house and purse filled with meds nauseated by the phlegm filled gut, but I did and I was never happier that I forced myself into Wonderland for my daughter. I was blessed doubly by lil sister being my White Rabbit for the day.

How to find a job after being out of the loop...Or it's no longer found in the classifieds

When you have been out of the job market for long periods of time-decade or plural. You realize that not only are the ways you find jobs different-- Once you went to places looking for a sign in the window, looked in the want ads in the paper, some companies have computer terminals in their locations to complete applications and assessments, and now there are more than just websites. There are apps. But then within the apps, you have to watch who are posting jobs.

My current fave is LINKEDIN Here is my profile https://www.linkedin.com/in/danyel-statzer-mcdaniel-948b6610 Let's link up!


On the apps, you are able to scan and search based on location or keywords or both. When you get your results, that is when the real work starts. You must visually skim what is not for you. I have things in my head I am looking for-- insurance, retirement, but I am looking for a unique work environment. You have seen those workplaces on TV or heard about them. Free breakfast or lunch or a fun room where peers get together for stress relief. I want a company that truly has that philosophy that happy workers are better workers.


There are subgroups posting on these sites.

1. Recruiters for staffing agencies
2. Recruiters for companies
3. Recruiters for "sales" positions where you only get paid if you sell
4. Direct posts from companies by their HR like normal


I do not know if there are downsides to these differences but the loops to jump through a staffing agency puts me off a bit. I skim these jobs and so far none of them have made my short list, so it hasn't mattered.

The other part of my current research is what are the jobs out there? And do I need any additional certification or training?

If you are in the medical field, IT, engineers, sales, or skilled labor-- then SW Ohio is for you. I don't want to be in social services anymore; the field I have served in for 18 years. My first job out of college was in mental health switching to social work in the public school system in 2006. Now I want to learn new skills, try and utilize all I have learned in college, my internships (three in schools, one in a mailroom, and one in a homeless shelter), FWSP jobs in HR and mailroom at Antioch and one precollege job at a Thriftway grocery store and open that next door.


I have customer service experience, retail/grocery experience, mail standards experience, human resource experience, housing, teaching daily living skills, meal planning, budget planning, transportation, medication management, supervisor of 15 staff, QA financial, QA review, community involvement, blogging, accessing community resources, Microsoft Office, --I digress.

What I am getting at poorly but I am trying to pull the train back around to, I have what I feel like is a great tool box of skills but I look on these sites and I am like--- uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

I don't think I am going to open the paper (kidding) and see my skills listed off perfectly and I will get a light bulb over my head, put on my best suit, walk into the Daily Moon and say 'Ms. Goldberg, I am the one you have been looking for', hand her my resume and we go to lunch to hash out the logistics.

Positive visualization.