6 ways online dating and job hunting are similar

After more than a decade of marriage and now almost two years since we separated, the dating scene is unlike anything I have never known. I also now have the need and the desire to find a new path for my career. Both utilize online apps and that is just the first step in the comparison of Job hunting and online dating.

1. Utilization of online apps- Every aspect of life seems to have an app for that. And dating and job searching are no different. I didn't and couldn't afford a pay site for dating so I went with a freebie, Plenty of Fish. The job hunt has more apps than I utilize but the ones I have tried are LinkedIn, Indeed, Glassdoor, and ZipRecruiter. My preference right now is Glassdoor and Ziprecruiter, Glassdoor gives great insights into the company and what it is like to work there from reviews by current and former employees. Ziprecruiter has a great search engine and has some direct companies hiring, I have come across sites that are nothing but filter through another app. Well, why wouldn't I go to the source and skip the middle man.

2. Most profiles or jobs are bullshit- With online dating, my first rule was to avoid the profiles listed as Widows. I found most of them to not be widows but typically they were fake profiles. Any time the person was too hot, I would check the profile and sure enough, he was a widow. I have had the same experience on Facebook. I still get the weekly request from Military men who are widows. Their profiles only have one or two pics and when you look it up online to research the name, it is a fake account. Now in the job hunt, the postings are not typically fake but they are filled with non-sales, sales jobs. For instance, they will advertise the job as one thing, and to read the description it sounds kinda promising until you read the review and see that its commission based only or the money they were offering for the job is a projected average and nothing like the paycheck you will receive.

3. Wading through the Muck- Now I have not been as lucky in my job search as I have with the online dating. I had a few standards I set for what I wanted from a partner-- must drive, must have a job or career that he is passionate about, we must inspire and motivate each other and if he mentions sex in the first email or just comments on my looks, then I would send a thoughtfully crafted question. Most responded with pleasantries that were insincere. I looked for emails that were original in thought and more that one sentence. Using these tactics, helped clear the muck and made it easy to spot the emerald in the grass. I am still knee high in the job search muck. I would love your comments on how you have navigated this system. I read the job descriptions and now the company reviews as well to make it simpler to identify one a job I want two, a job I am qualified for and finally to see what kind of culture this company has and represents.

4. If you're not careful you will be fucked, figuratively and actually- Most emails I got on Plenty of Fish were asking for sex. Some were more sly and would talk to you for like a day and ask for sexts or actual sex. Also in my job search, I have gotten the most response from what I have begun to call pyramid jobs. You can make money by recruiting or selling something like an entry-level position for people looking to change their career path. Also, these jobs are listed as making $50k plus But when you read the company reviews and job feedback on sites like Glassdoor and ZipRecruiter you learn the opinion of current and former employees. Its too bad plenty of fish does not offer reviews of the profiles on their site. I wish I could have let other online daters about some of the real a-holes on their site.

5. There are gems, maybe just not in the way you expected -- I got hundreds of messages from randos that were looking for something I wasn't, including an offer to dress, bath, feed and change a man who had a baby fetish. And being approached by a few married couples looking for more "friends," but I did find my gem almost ten months ago.

6. Always respond even if it is to politely say no- I knew that most of the people emailing me were not the daters I wanted and recruiters are sometimes just looking for a warm body. I say that 90% (not scientifically proven) of the responses I get for both online dating and job searching is all bullshit. Online recruiting has moved from the real companies doing a direct hire and mostly the postings are from recruiting organizations. I know enough to know that is how these businesses make money is by selling their services as a third-party Human resources department or guaranteed to fill your positions, etc. But that does not help us job searchers in our process. I am not saying I don't apply to these third-party recruiters but I try to steer away from those.

In life, I am just trying to find my #hippiehappy. Whether it is with a mate or in a new line of work. I hope to do a follow up to this piece when I figure out what I want to be when I grow up.

New Website coming soon...

I am tickled pink and tiffany blue about the amazing expansions happening in my world. I just finished the base of my new website, danyelstatzer.com.

Can you change your stars?

My hippie happy life

Can you change your stars?

Do we dare to dream and then take action...

#learningeveryday

Why do we stay in dead-end jobs, marriage or lifestyles? Most likely because we become comfortable. Change is scary. Or that is the bullshit we tell ourselves when faced with choices or situations. My favorite pastime is learning. I truly value the ability to read, comphrend, and utilitize the information to improve some aspect of life.

#bettereveryday

I have always lived by the philosophy that we should improve ourselves some way every day. It could be reading a book, changing a habit as small as closing the cabinets. But I like to think that most days I can say I learned something miniscule every night upon meditation.

Right now I am researching and hoping to learn from a few online learning institutions. My first stop has been Alison.They offer free online learning but if you want the certificate then you pay a relativity small price. But there doesn't seem to be accreditation but if it's really about having the knowledge to do a job or skill does accreditation matter? I guess that will be a future blog. Alison overs thousands of classes ranging from Resume writing to French to Project Management. They have career paths that offer many courses to improve your knowledge of the given subject.

Yesterday, I found an allegedly free MBA through Smartly. There is an application process, which is something I have pending. Their site also includes free learning certificates in business. So far their courses seemed center 100% on business management.

Long time no blog. Baby its cold outside and I wanted to write

I would love to tell you that I have not written in months or longer because I am out there living life, making memories and changing my place in the universe. And I wouldn't be lying. I have met an amazing man who motivates me to be the best version of myself every day. Eight months later and I still am excited to talk to him and even more stoked to see him in person.

But the bigger part of what is going on is a renewal of my reading and learning brain cells. My biggest complaint about epilepsy medications is the loss of higher level functioning that has had me struggling for the last 5 years. But six months ago, I worked with my doc to take away the Topamax, aka dopamax. I really expected to instantly have my insatiable desire to learn and read back. The process of regaining the brain I once knew was slow. But now, I am sucking in the marrow of knowledge.

I am learning new job skills in particular. I am exploring the fields of Human Resources, Marketing Research, Retail Technology, Tarot and Project Management. I truly get pleasure from learning and reading.

I am trying to learn how to take things I am passionate about into all parts of my life. But I am also aware that growth is necessary to keep from stagnating. Once that hazardous materials are dumped in your lake it is hard to clarify the waters.

Starting over is scary but not as scary as drowning in the lake.

Sorry for the ramble.