I love Dutch Ovens (and not the kind under the sheets)

Part of my path of improvement of me has been trying to simplify my life through many areas particularly in the area of cooking. We have been slowly going Organic and unprocessed over the last year. One of the things I wanted to own was a cast iron dutch oven like I saw the Pioneer Woman use on the Cooking Channel.

I found one on sale at Kroger for $24.95 on Friday and there is nothing I love more than a bargain. Last night I made a seared pot roast-- best I ever made.  Something primal about making a meal that has been made for hundreds of years.

 In college I thought I wanted to be a liberated woman and what I thought that meant. I thought stay at home moms were lesser women. I couldn't fathom a woman going to college getting a degree then once she was married just staying home to have kids.  College Danyel thought that was beneath say becoming a doctor, psychologist, social worker, author any job was better than staying home.

I did not see that there  could be pride in making a meal for your family. In college I was lucky not to burn my spaghettos and pop tarts.  Food to me was nutrition to keep me going, I saw none of the preparation, none of the heart that went into it.

Now at 37, married with an almost teenager who hates me most of the time and an eight year old son who still loves his mommy, I take such pride in sauteing  the onions (which 10 years ago I wouldn't have even cooked with because I hate onions) because they really do add a great flavor to the meat.  using my new dutch oven to slow cook a meal that my kids may not appreciate the way I would hope but I know the hours of love and care that the veggies are all organic and the meat had the proper marbling of fat for the best flavor, not to mention the seasoning and all gluten free to stay within my diet restrictions. They don't care about any of that, not now.

 But I look back on the hot meals my mother had on the table every night and I understand now what a stay at home mother does. When I work 40hrs a week, and struggle to remotely keep the house clean, I understand what a stay at home mother does. There are times when I feel a little sad that I was unable to fully give my kids all of me as a mother. Luckily they do get me every summer when I am off with my job.

A small part of me wishes I could move to a remote farm, grow my own food and live a rustic pioneer organic hippie life writing books. But I would have to still buy my meat, I couldn't raise animal friends then eat them. I love meat but I couldn't do that.